feeding my own misguided insanity

Browsing Category 'Humour'

I really don’t care for the Emirates Foundation, duty free shopping or the number of languages spoken by the crew, nor do I enjoy announcements that belch through the headphones at a pain inducing volume, override my preferences and pause my show. I care little for local time, the outside air temperature or that some […]

The once bustling hallways of Dubai Mall were virtually people-free this morning. Shop roller-shutters closed tight, lights dimmed and closure notices displayed prominently on many shopfront windows. Restaurants that once served up deliciously smelling delights lay barren without any hint of service, produce or the usual eclectic clientele. Astronomers Divided A few days ago the […]

I’m not exactly sure when terrorist phobia started becoming part of the general aviation landscape, but I’m pretty sure it had something to do with 9/11. A prime example of how the few bad eggs can spoil it all for the rest of us. The US, with its finite wisdom, has managed to spread most […]

Native English speakers seem to have a unique knack for always getting my name wrong irrespective of how many times they’ve heard it being said or witnessed it in print. I would imagine this be the case for many Eastern Europeans whose names are a jumble of vowels and consonants that require a Scrabble veteran […]

Given my fondness for a well-rounded wine, it’s not at all surprising, then, that I donned the latest in Eastern European farm-fashion and jumped at the chance of making my own plonk. Bulgaria has been famous for its winemaking regions ever since the time of Thracian rule, around 500 BC, so who could blame me […]

If you woke up this morning to the sound of a dull thud against your apartment’s front door, it can only mean one thing, January 5 fever. That’s right bargain-hunters, we’re all being summoned to partake in the one of the greatest testaments to consumerism – The Dubai Shopping Festival (DSF). And what was that […]

The ever-present legions of opportunists standing at street corners – eager to jump at the chance to be a tour guide, procure goods, carry them or even find a whore – does take a bit of getting used to. Eventually one comes to terms with the underbelly of society and begins to admire the finesse […]

On far too many occasions I’ve been accused of hating children and even the whole parenting experience. Once and for all I would like to settle this ridiculous matter. Just because I don’t have any of my own doesn’t make me a child hater. I’m not quite sure of the logic behind the accusations but […]

Over the years I’ve often wondered what it is about men and spitting when in the toilet, or more importantly, why they feel compelled to spit before urinating. This whole spitting activity was completely foreign to me, until one day, I noticed that the guy standing next to me spat into the urinal before relieving […]

No matter how ridiculous the airport security checkpoints may appear, the rest of the world has nothing on the experience one gets in the US. I completely support bag x-ray machines, metal detectors, the explosive residue and contraband swab, the customs sniffer dogs and even annoying questioning, but I draw the line when common sense […]